Forgiveness
Forgiveness is one of the most misunderstood and yet most essential movements in personal alchemy. Most of us carry ideas about forgiveness that keep us stuck, when in reality forgiveness is one of the most direct paths to inner freedom, to release, and ultimately to a return to joy.
Most people assume that when we forgive, we are doing something for someone else, that forgiveness is an act directed outward, a kind of generosity or moral gesture towards another person. But in reality, one hundred percent of forgiveness is for ourselves. There are no exceptions to this. Forgiveness is not about the other person at all, it is a gift we give ourselves, a way of freeing ourselves from the ongoing burden of pain, resentment, and suffering that we carry.
When we hold on to not forgiving someone, we are the ones who suffer most. The other person may have moved on, may not even be aware of the depth of our pain, but we continue to carry it, often for years, sometimes for a lifetime. In my experience, particularly in clinical work, people find it very difficult to fully embrace this idea, that forgiveness is not about what the other person deserves, but about the freedom we are choosing for ourselves.
